ABBY: Drugs put a stop to patient’s love life | Lifestyles



CHER ABBY by Abigail Van Buren


DEAR ABBY: I’ve been dealing with anxiety and depression for decades, but I’m finally taking a drug that works for me. I’m in my 40s and feeling emotionally stable for the first time in my adult life. When I started taking the drug I was in a bad spot, but after a few months I broke up with my partner and started to focus on my career.

It’s been a few years now and I have no libido at all. I felt the urge to start dating someone again, but even if I do meet someone, I doubt my libido will return while taking this medication, which would be unfair to the other person. I’m afraid my choice is between future relationships and my sanity. My doctor suggested that I add another drug that might help, but it took so long to find something that worked that I didn’t want to start experimenting again. Can you offer any advice? – OBTAINED SOIL IN ILLINOIS

DEAR GOTTEN: I am glad to know that after so much trial and error you have finally found a medicine that has allowed you to get your life back on your feet. I invite you to listen to your doctor. If your doctor thinks there is anything that might help you, try it. If it disrupts the progress you’ve made, you can always stop. But please don’t deny yourself the opportunity to live a fuller life.

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DEAR ABBY: I am engaged to “George”, a wonderful man who has grown children. He and his ex went through a bitter divorce several years ago. His kids mostly blame him, but he always tries to relate to them.

The two younger ones seem to have accepted it over time. Her eldest daughter, however, is very close to her mother and always bitter. She is getting married and told him that she doesn’t want him to bring any guests. George and I have been living together for a year and it was never a secret that we dated before. I don’t know how to feel about this. I have no relationship with his children, but I would like to be there. How do I deal with this? – LEFT IN THE EAST

DEAR LEFT: In plain English. Ask George what he thinks about being expected to go to his daughter’s wedding alone since he has been living with you for a year. (Is he supposed to participate?) When you do, point out to your fiancé that if his daughter is allowed to dictate this, that will only be the beginning, as there will be other milestones that you will be excluded from as well.

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DEAR READERS: Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and no Thanksgiving would be complete without sharing the traditional prayer written by my dear late mother:

Heavenly Father,

We thank you for the food and we remember the hungry.

We thank you for the health and we remember the sick.

We thank You for friends and remember those without friends.

We thank you for the freedom and we remember the slaves.

May these memories inspire us to service,

May your gifts for us be used for others.


Have a happy and safe celebration everyone! – Love, ABBY

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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For everything you need to know about planning a wedding, order “How to organize a beautiful wedding”. Send your name and mailing address, along with a check or money order for $ 8 (in US dollars) to: Dear Abby, Wedding Booklet, PO Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Shipping and handling costs are included in the price.)

(EDITORS: If you have editorial questions, please contact Clint Hooker, [email protected])


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